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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/24249340">how can i not fall for you</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account'>orphan_account</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Stray Kids (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Fluff and Angst, Han Jisung being an anti americano here, Hwang Hyunjin is Whipped, Kim Seungmin just doesn’t know how to confess, M/M, bangchan is the best bro, poor felix my baby, so that's how hyunjin sulks</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-05-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-05-18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-02 21:14:17</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Not Rated</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,168</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/24249340</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/orphan_account</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Hyunjin just want to throw himself into the lake or fly to Melbourne staying with his Chan hyung when he realized his feelings are sadly not being reciprocated.</p>
<p>or,</p>
<p>Seungmin just doesn't know how to express his feeling in words, precisely in that three words eight letters.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Hwang Hyunjin &amp; Kim Seungmin, Hwang Hyunjin/Kim Seungmin</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>8</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>82</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>how can i not fall for you</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>let's bite seungjin because they're not thriving ksksksks</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>“Hyunjins,” He smiles a little when the excited voice from the other line greeted his ears. “Chan hyung, how have you been?”</p>
<p>“All good mate, all good.”</p>
<p>Talking with Chan hyung, an aussie brother he met 4 years ago is always nothing but refreshing. His soothing voice never fails to put Hyunjin’s heart at peace so maybe, Hyunjin figured, asking some favor from the older won’t hurt right?</p>
<p>“Hyung,”</p>
<p>“Yeah?”</p>
<p>Hyunjin inhales deeply while throwing his glance on the lake, prodding calmly in front of his eyes. “Can I go to Melbourne, to meet you?</p>
<p>Chan shrieks with an expression which Hyunjin decided was an excitement and massive disbelief. “Are you for real Hyunjins?! Of course you can! You comin’ with Seungmin?”</p>
<p>Oh well, he can foresee that question to roll from Chan’s tongue. Aside from Jisung and him, Seungmin is Chan’s utmost favorite because let’s be honest, who won’t love Seungmin? He is sure the younger has that superpower in making everyone to swoon over him and make them to love him and unfortunately, in Hyunjin’s case; the love he has for the younger is really—not platonic at all, defeating the regular case.</p>
<p>His love is pathetically overflowing.</p>
<p>Sighing dejectedly, his mind goes back to the call. “Er hyung, how about no?” Hyunjin can hear Chan gasps rather loudly indicating that he, indeed, can totally understand what this is all about. “Is this the love quarrel I smell?”</p>
<p>“Listen Hyunjins my cute marshmallow. I’ll always welcome you if you want to come here, to stay with me.”</p>
<p>“But..?” Chan chuckles and Hyunjin can’t help but to smile along.</p>
<p>“But it is better for you to sort things out with your Minnie, kay? My Hyunjin is a gentleman, no?”</p>
<p>“Am I?”</p>
<p>“Yes you are, Hyunjins. And still, if you already decided to come here I’ll always welcome you with my big big heart. Just don’t forget to inform me of the details.”</p>
<p>“Thanks Hyung.”</p>
<p>“Don’t thank me. I’ll always be here, yeah?”</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin shuts his eyes after the call, feeling the cold breeze brushing his cheeks. Sun is not all warm today as it’s hiding behind some fluffs of clouds and Hyunjin can’t be grateful enough for that. The serene atmosphere however, manages to remind him of what happened earlier that day.</p>
<p>(He was in English class when he got the call from Jisung. Looking at the caller id, he just wanted to ignore the call for at least until the lesson ended but his phone couldn’t just stop vibrating. Reluctantly, he picked up the phone and almost with a hushed voice he asked Jisung what’s going on.</p>
<p>“Felix got into an accident so can you take Seungmin with you, here?</p>
<p>Hyunjin’s heart dropped when he heard the news. The worries started to take over him and he wanted to ask more about Felix but figured he had no time to waste. Thus, he sprinted out from the class after telling his lecturer and searching for his boyfriend.</p>
<p>They arrived at the hospital not too long after that. The sterile smell that welcomed them made all the unsettled feelings become worse than they already were. Seungmin was already a crying mess and Hyunjin got nothing to do but hold his hand, giving a little squeeze as a sign of comfort as they rushed onto the counter. Later, they could see Jisung having a small talk with Felix’s parents and relief washed over them as the doctor who’s in charge informed that Felix just had a minor injury, and there’s nothing serious occurred.</p>
<p>
  <em>Thank god.</em>
</p>
<p>He could see how worried Seungmin was when he, in no time, rushed over to Felix's room and tackled his best friend in a big hug while Jisung and him tailed along from behind.</p>
<p>“Lixie! Oh lord you’re making us worry!” Seungmin said while he’s obviously still crying and Felix just smiled, hugging his friend back. “Seungmin, be careful!” Jisung yelled out loud watching how fierce the hug yanking was.  His anxiety arose just from that alone.</p>
<p>“Oh my god lixie I’m so sorry.” Seungmin retreated back from the older one, more carefully this time. Hyunjin just amused looking at how concerned Seungmin was despite his cold demeanor and sometimes a meanie he possessed. Those reverse charms were inevitably one of the so many reasons why he could fall in love with his stunning boyfriend.</p>
<p>That’s it until his stomach started banging a rock song, asking for some food for lunch and that’s when things started going down. Hyunjin has this one distinct trait where he didn’t like to eat alone. No matter how childish that sounds, he doesn’t care or he actually never wants to care.</p>
<p>“Sunshine, let’s grab our lunch. I’m hungry.” Hyunjin pleaded while tugging his boyfriend’s sweatshirt sleeve, hoping that his wish would be granted. “Can you go with Jisung first? I want to accompany Lix here.” Seungmin's honey voice was soft, as usual, like it was convincing Hyunjin that it’s okay to eat with Jisung just this one time. Instead, Hyunjin didn’t feel like it’s okay at all.</p>
<p>He loves eating with Jisung. The whole world knows his closest friend is a very excellent mood maker and it’s his specialty that he can jump to a conversation from every direction available and vary from insignificant talks to a deeper one but what to do? his heart wants Seungmin and Seungmin only. </p>
<p>“Yehet, what with that lemonade sour face? It’s not that bad eating with me, Jinnie!”)</p>
<p>Unfortunately, his heartbroken series didn’t stop at that.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>His long reverie is cut off when he hears a notification chimed in his phone. </p>
<p>
  <b>Jisungie</b>
</p>
<p>Where are you, Jinnie?</p>
<p>Holy macaroni</p>
<p>You’ve been a way</p>
<p>for too long alr</p>
<p>
  <b>You</b>
</p>
<p>I’m not telling you</p>
<p>you ugly squirrel</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin just opts to put his phone back in his pocket, not intending to further messaging Jisung. It’s not like it was Seungmin who’s worried for him.</p>
<p>
  <em> Ouch- that’s kinda hurt to be honest.  </em>
</p>
<p>Little did Hyunjin know, he was missing something after he muted his phone.</p>
<p>[one unread notification: Jisungie]</p>
<p>
  <b>Jisungie</b>
</p>
<p>Hyunjin do tell me</p>
<p>Min’s about to turn </p>
<p>into thanos and </p>
<p>he’s hella worried fgs</p>
<p> </p>
<p>Hyunjin sighs and there’s one voice at the back of mind asking him to just throw himself to the quiet lake. His heart keeps twisting painfully so he thinks, maybe, it’s better to be surrounded by water rather than keep being reminded about the heartbreak. It’s not like he will die— he’s a great swimmer after all. </p>
<p>Hyunjin and Seungmin started off as mutual friends of Jisung and later they formed a group of friends along with Felix, an aussie exchange student for this semester but decided just to stay here for good.</p>
<p>Their friendship is one of the precious things Hyunjin treasures the most; except his feelings that start to bloom for that biology major student at the beginning of their degree year. And everyone knows very well that Seungmin is always looking at Felix with heart eyes, not that subtle in showing his interest to the part time dancer.</p>
<p>However— Felix is the one who’s so oblivious and to make Seungmin sadder, he's already crushing on someone which Jisung had called the guy, an emo senior who coolly raps but not as cool as him-<em>literally what Jisung said</em> and he’s a year older than them.</p>
<p>It pained him to see Seungmin cry that one day, all gloomy when he got to know the truth. Nevertheless, Hyunjin didn’t know what demon possessed him that day or why his brain to mouth filter didn’t function as it should when he suddenly unknowingly blurted out <em>a</em>,</p>
<p>“You can just be my boyfriend, though.”</p>
<p>Partly it just a slipped out and partly, he couldn’t deny it that to be honest— that’s what his heart has wanted for so long after knowing the younger guy. Seungmin’s angelic smile that accompanies him on his nights or just his presence that unconsciously makes him look forward to living his life everyday, is a massive driving force. Not to mention the melodic honey voice whenever Seungmin called Hyunjin’s name— it lingers in his ears and resonates in his heart, yeah that’s how bad Hyunjin was falling.</p>
<p>Albeit he knows there’s only a weeny tiny chance the latter will accept him, Seungmin actually to his utmost surprise had accepted the offer and it shocked him to the core. As if that’s a dream, he didn’t want to wake up just yet. And if Hyunjin was actually going to act like a fool in love when he heard Seungmin, he just curbed all the excitement inside.</p>
<p>They started off as that awkward couple where it looks like there’s no mutual feeling involved and Hyunjin nearly gave up thinking this was all wrong from the start. (but who’s he kidding anyway? Loving Seungmin is never a wrong thing to do) Seungmin took a long time to actually open up to him, and being comfortable with all the skinships and fondness Hyunjin has to offer.</p>
<p>And at that, as he can see they are thriving better and he was sure they already reached a level where Seungmin is moving on with his life; from his crush to Felix and maybe, reciprocating his pure feelings, out of sudden shit like today happened.</p>
<p> </p>
<p>(“What is this slander to Americano you ugly?” Hyunjin rolled his eyes, legs marching faster to Felix’s room. Entertaining Han Jisung was really tiring.</p>
<p>Jisung made a wide gesture while trying his best not to bump into lots of people in the hallway. “No, I don’t understand why homosapien like you would like to drink something so bitter when you have a better choice?” Hyunjin heaved a glad sigh when he already reached the room.</p>
<p>He was gonna slide the door open when he heard a faint voice of Seungmin muttering an ‘i love you’ to Felix before leaning forward and kissing Felix’s forehead and the time seemed to stop. He was frozen at the spot, tears started to pool in the corner of his eyes. Jealousy, feeling defeated and <em>whatever </em>feelings started to appear at the moment had made Hyunjin to just stand there, staring blankly. </p>
<p>“Jinnie, why are you still not open—“ Jisung asked impatiently before his eyes darting back to the exact same scene Hyunjin had witnessed, his eyes widened in utter shock.</p>
<p>“You’re right Jisung. Americano is indeed bitter. It’s so so bitter im just a dumb one to choose them.”</p>
<p>
  <em> Oh lord, mayday!) </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>
  <em> ‘So Seungmin still loves Felix, he never loves me, wait— he never says he is.’ </em>
</p>
<p>He wipes the tears that continuously stain his cheeks harshly with his shirt’s sleeve. A bitter laugh escapes his pink lips. Right. Seungmin never said he loves him all this while. He knows there’s no use in crying either. Until this day, he still can’t make Seungmin fall in love with him.</p>
<p>
  <em> ‘Sorry Chan hyung, I’m no gentleman.’ </em>
</p>
<p> </p>
<p>“Where do you think you’re going without me?” The shaking voice successfully breaks down the whole solid silence Hyunjin is too into. </p>
<p>His heart beats faster in miles per second, with a very unusual rate when Seungmin’s figure approaches him. <em> ‘How did he know i'm here?’ </em> His eyes fall on his sunshine’s face that’s reflecting on today’s sun. Honestly, it’s not bright. Not at the slightest bit.</p>
<p>Hyunjin bites his lips, trying to curb everything he feels inside before he’s melting down all over again. Maybe this is the best time to— to let Seungmin go and let him find his true love?</p>
<p>
  <em> wow truth hurts.  </em>
</p>
<p>He tries to swallow whatever lump that started to form on his throat. “Seungmin,” His voice is so thick and he hates how much he just wanna call Seungmin his sunshine as he used to and Hyunjin fails to notice the huge disappointment washed over the younger’s face upon hearing his name. </p>
<p>“I think— I think,” he tries again for the second time. His eyes wander elsewhere, not daring to look at Seungmin’s. <em> Lord, why is this so hard. </em>“I think it’s time to let you go.”</p>
<p>Hyunjin is to say the least scared to face Seungmin, to face the truth. He just wants to run away on that time, or fly to Melbourne and stay with Chan hyung or just throw himself into the lake like what he thought. Everything will do but not this. </p>
<p>Hyunjin can feel the warm presence radiates beside him. “Look at me,” Seungmin says, demanding. Hyunjin doesn’t want to comply or more like— he can’t comply out of his pettiness. “I said look at me, Hwang.” Seungmin doesn’t have any options but to lift his lover’s chin and meet his eyes. </p>
<p>That’s the moment when he realized Seungmin has just the same red swollen eyes as him and they’re being drawn into the melancholy bubble for a good few minutes. </p>
<p>“Why did you want to let me go when in fact,” Hyunjin’s heart shatters at the small voice asking him. Seungmin’s fierce facade was long gone when he balled his hands on Hyunjin’s chest, trying to brace himself. “I don’t want to go anywhere, without you?”</p>
<p>Hyunjin’s mind swirls at the said statement, much confused on what’s going on. “Sunshine, you don’t love me you love—“ Hyunjin’s hand making a way to detach Seungmin’s hand from his chest. Seungmin must not know but the way his gaze hold Hyunjin’s is irresistibly endearing yet so painful at the same time. He’s weak for this and he’s scared if he can’t do what he’s determined to do before which is, <em>to let go. </em></p>
<p>Seungmin looks at him in grimace. “Who says I don’t love you stupid?!” Seungmin could care less if there’s any people around the lake that can hear his loud yell. Hyunjin is very much insane and he’s driving Seungmin insane as well.</p>
<p>“What? But i saw—“</p>
<p>So seungmin guesses it right. “That’s a platonic thing, Hyunjin. I was comforting him as he already gave up in chasing his love life— yeah that emo boy.” A funny smile plastered on Seungmin’s face, can’t resist how ridiculous Hyunjin’s face is portrayed at the moment. “My feelings for Felix had long faded away,” Hyunjin didn’t know why but yeah he’s helplessly being hopeful again. “—since you entered my life.”</p>
<p>
  <em> But you never tell me you love me or say it back.  </em>
</p>
<p>Seungmin chuckles bitterly at that. Hyunjin closed his mouth in an instant, not realizing he said that out loud.</p>
<p>Seungmin inhales deeply, eyes fixed to the ground. “I’m sorry about that. You know— I’m so bad at this kind of sappy mushy thing. I’m trying to tell you when i think there’s the best time but well, yeah, i'm moving too slow I guess? My dumb ass is making you insecure all over again, thinking that I don’t love you when—,“</p>
<p>Hyunjin inhales deeply. This is all his fault right? He shouldn’t pressure Seungmin to actually rush in loving him because he knows better than anyone else that the younger likes to have his own pace. “Seungmin, you don’t need to say this if you don’t mean it, i mean you don’t need to rush,”</p>
<p>“For god sake Hyunjin, I'm trying to be sweet here, don't cut me.” Hyunjin doesn’t know why but looking at this frustrated and clumsy Seungmin is so mesmerizing. “Okay, sorry.”</p>
<p>Seungmin lifts his head, eyes locked with a pair of deep brown orbs in front of him. He musters  all the courage left because— <em> go big or go home </em>, Seungmin.</p>
<p>Seungmin grabs his boyfriend’s hands. He’s not kidding when he is slightly scared if Hyunjin will pull off his hands but thankfully, <em> thank god </em> that’s not happening. Despite his heart pounding way too loudly in his chest, he gives the latter’s hands a little squeeze, prompting Seungmin to continue on whatever he wanted to say. And he’s not forget to put his ethereal dimple on display, not intervening this time.</p>
<p><em> Oh why I’m so bad at this but at least those prominent dimples had save me</em>. </p>
<p>Seungmin clears his throat, killing all the embarrassment and hesitation that starts to build up. “How can i not love you when you’re the one that got my back when things turned upside down? How can I not love you when you’re always there to cry and laugh with me? How can I not love you when… i think i can own the whole world when the thing you just do is loving me—“</p>
<p>They are not poetic or too corny or anything but they just smoothly pierces through Hyunjin’s heart and at that, Hyunjin just silently sobs listening to Seungmin’s sincere words.</p>
<p>“I love you, Hwang Hyunjin. I love you lots.”</p>
<p>Hyunjin is indeed speechless, with the heartfelt confession he never expects; not even in his wild imagination to get this in his next life. Hyunjin is so happy, no scratch that— He’s too overwhelmed, his heart goes beyond the sky to outer space thus, instinctively, he resorts to kissing Seungmin instead channeling all his overflowing feelings. </p>
<p>Their first kiss is short to say the least but both of them know they won’t trade it for anything. That memorable kiss left them in warm fuzzy feelings along with the oath on their mind to always take care of each other and always makes things out.</p>
<p>And for now, he’s firm that his feelings are indeed being returned back. </p>
<p>“I’m sorry I’m making you worried earlier,” Hyunjin cups his sunshine’s face, thumb brushes his lover’s cheeks. He feels bad like <em> so so bad.  </em></p>
<p>Seungmin leans his torso back from Hyunjin, and crosses his hands on the chest. “Don’t you ever dare try to fly to Melbourne without telling me.” He knits his eyebrows in unsatisfaction. <em> How come Hyunjin ever thought to do that? </em>“Is that how you sulk?” Seungmin purse out his lips. </p>
<p>Hyunjin grins sheepishly at that. He scratches his nape, not knowing what to say. “About that— hey! Maybe if you tell me that you love me sooner, I won't waste my credit to call Chan hyung.” He sticks his tongue out to Seungmin. </p>
<p>The way Seungmin glares at him is just like so <em> scary </em> and Hyunjin wants to do nothing but to coo over. “And lord— the international call is too expensive too what I’ve been thinking?” He eyes Seungmin’s sour reaction and <em> lord why why why he needs to be that cute?  </em></p>
<p>“Serve you right you annoying fluffball!” Hyunjin beams at how Seungmin is actually passive aggressive in showing his fake annoyance. </p>
<p>“No, you love me.”</p>
<p>“Excuse me mister but did i say otherwise?”</p>
<p>He laughs loudly at the witty remarks the younger had thrown. Oh wait— maybe Hyunjin forgot to say most important thing ever to his Seungmin. </p>
<p>“Hey sunshine,” he lunches forward in such an endearing manner, still being all careful (because this just their second one) and putting his hand on Seungmin’s nape, shortening the distance.</p>
<p>and they kiss for the second time. </p>
<p>“I love you, too.”</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>actually i hv another work crammed in my draft but i impulsively wrote this instead hh thanks for your reading! hv a nice day pipol! (oh lets pretend chan is from melbourne because fgs i forgot he's from sydney ;_;)</p></blockquote></div></div>
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